Am I Missing Out?

This blog is a bit of a tricky one to write because in so many ways it can possibly make others feel like crap and truly that is not my goal (keep reading I swear!)

The other day while getting some new pole pics done my photographer asked me if I felt deprived. At first I was a bit confused (deprived of what??) and then I got a bit mad (classic Shelby). But he truly was very curious.

You see, my lovely monster is currently ten months old. Just ten months. And at ten months post partum this is my body.

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Some of you may have similar mindsets to my photographer: how much did you have to diet to look like that? You probably missed out on a lot just to be lean.

And some of you might roll your eyes, take offense or mark me as “one of those people”.

And while my goal isn’t to shame any other mom for not looking like this (seriously keep reading) I am not going to deny that I’m not proud of my current physique.

And the things it can do

And the things it can do

But do I feel deprived? Have I missed out on eating fun foods, been cranky about my diet or in any other way felt like I had to do this?

No, actually I didn’t and I don’t.

And here’s where it gets a bit tricky. First off, if you are a new mom (or even the mom of a toddler or teenager) and you didn’t “bounce back” after your pregnancy… that’s okay! In fact, that’s normal.

Let me repeat that: You. Are. normal.

Does this make me abnormal? Well, in many ways I am 😛 but no, I am just different.

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The majority of people don`t do things like this!

You see, prior to pregnancy I already had great habits. I had found a system I enjoyed, that my body responded to, that I could maintain and I stuck with it. Post pregnancy my system remained much the same and this is how my body responded.

So again, do I feel deprived?

No. because I am not, nor have I since I had Zoey, been dieting. Period.

I have, however, become accustomed to eating a certain way; I don’t eat much processed food on a regular basis because it makes my stomach hurt. I literally have the exact same eating habits I had before pregnancy and during pregnancy. They consist of the following: eat food when hungry.

My favorite after dinner snack.. a smoothie bowl!

My favorite after dinner snack.. a smoothie bowl!

Is that food naturally more nutrient dense? Yes. Because again, it makes me feel good and with a little monster crawling around it is the only way I can keep my energy levels up.

Are there foods I don’t eat? No. I still have ice cream and pizza and whatever else I may want when I want it. But probably not daily. A lunch poutine isn’t exactly going to make me want to chase Zo around the backyard for hours…

And finally, my exercise routine. Clearly I must have gone all out to achieve this. And truthfully that answer is yes and no.

I do work out, a lot. About 5 days per week. Is it to look like this though? No. You can check out my blog on changing my goals here. It’s because exercising keeps me sane and patient throughout the day. If you don’t believe me, ask my husband what I am like on days I don’t have any physical activity. The answer can include any other following: angry, annoyed, short tempered etc. I exercise because I enjoy it and my schedule allows for it.

Deep Squat

Lifting makes me happy

But getting back to my previous statement of how I am different… this is simply who I am. And you can not expect to be me any more than I can expect to be you. Which means that if your body looks different than mine post pregnancy that’s good! Because we are different and have (I’m sure) many different habits/enjoyments/dislikes.

What frustrates me is that just as ladies are shamed for not looking cover model gorgeous after having a baby, I get shamed because I did return to my pre pregnancy body. And due to that it is assumed that I must have done something extreme to achieve this feat (though I assure you I haven’t). So truly, no one can win.

So instead of nitpicking about how you, me and all the other gorgeous mamas out there look, let’s remember that we created, carried and birthed beautiful little babes. That we are funny, sensitive, creative and much, much more than simply our waistline and let’s be proud of all mamas regardless. Because truly, we’re all just doing the best we can 🙂